A funny thing happened tonight at work. I admitted a lady who had chest pain because I was concerned she may have had a heart attack. She is obese and has a crap diet (her bedside cabinet was laden with Coke/sweets/crisps and she had only been in hospital for a few hours). Her blood glucose was high so she probably has diabetes. To test for this, you check a glucose level when the patient has been fasted. So I told her not to eat or drink anything for the next 8 hours before we did the blood test. She agreed, and I thought nothing more about it.
About an hour later, her daughter and son ushered me into the waiting area and informed me that they had three large pizzas and wanted to give some to me and the nursing staff. This has never happened before. It's not that I expect patients or their relatives to come bearing gifts to show their gratitude, but doctors rarely get more than a 'thank you' on the way out. So I was pretty happy to munch away at the Vegetarian Deluxe and Spicy Chicken (I shared it with some of the nurses of course - always good to keep them happy...).
Then I found myself wondering if the pizzas had been ordered with their mother in mind? Were they expecting her to eat one before I gave her the order to be 'Nil by Mouth'? Was I actually eating her share? Am I going to be as obese as she is? Will I be in a bed one day being told I am too fat by someone 40 years younger than me?So I did the only reasonable thing - I finished the pizza and left the garlic bread for the nurses.
9 comments:
Nicely done!
Mmmm... pizza...
you are fat already
there is no "oneday" about it
you are already a fat fuck
i am SO ordering pizza now
When I was doing my 4th year clinicals, a patient once sent me a bushel of apples. He said although I wasn't a doctor yet, he appreciated my cordial bedside manner and that I took some time to get to know him.
You are indeed a lardarse. And a buttmunch x
it's so nice of you to apportion some of the garlic bread to them poor nurses. but what about the pizza? or some cold beverage like sprite to wash the palate at least.
The general consensus is that you are indeed a fat waster.
Dr Stu suggests getting drunk on lots of fatty beer to drown your sorrows.
P.S. Corby is now the 2nd fattest town in the uk.
Now I want a pizza and it's the middle of the night. THANKS A LOT!!
Grateful patients? I cannot believe it. Have you become a writer of fiction perhaps?
Cardiology always seem to have the best food, and the nurses quite often reflect it! Bryn x
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